Snuff Review: FUBAR Toasted
FUBAR Says: “FUBAR Toasted is just that-Toasted to the MAX! This raging toast delivers all the complex flavor of traditional toasted snuffs that is cleverly hidden behind a burn and nic hit that is well worth the pain. Initially your sinus wants to revolt but when the skirmish settles down, a soothing sensation of smoke, roasted nuts and tobacco.”
I’ve had this bad boy sitting in or on my desk for several months now, but it’s only recently that I’ve gotten sufficiently acclimated to taking it that I’m willing to give it a good going-over here on this page.
You see, the FUBAR line of snuffs are marketed directly toward Americans; our military servicemembers, in particular. The FUBAR line is actually produced by Dholakia in India, but they aim to please the servicemember who can’t smoke, so it’s bold, slightly spicy, and packs a wallop.
With that said, the Toasted iteration is reputed to be far milder than its siblings Grunt, BOHICA, or (yes, it gets worse) Willie Pete. I can’t comment on that first-hand, as I’ve not had the (reportedly dubious) pleasure of sampling those other three flavors yet. It’s only a matter of time.
But today, I’m going to tell you about this guy:
Let’s talk for a moment about that “tin” — it isn’t tin. It’s plastic. Now, I’m still relatively new to snuff, so my experience of different houses’ packaging isn’t yet as extensive as it is with eliquid. That said, I honestly don’t know whether plastic containers for it are better, worse or just different, when it comes to how the product inside may be affected as regards taste, freshness, and so on.
What I can say is that I find it a little disappointing. Feels like something of a let-down. On the other hand, I also have another FUBAR offering called “Fugazi Black Joe”, and that one is in a proper tin. So I’m not sure what the thinking at Dholakia was that went into packaging one of their offerings in metal and the other in plastic.
Anyway, moving on:
You’ll have to forgive me while I play around with the metrics I use to evaluate snuffs. I’m so used to evaluating eliquids that a different medium means rearranging things, then tweaking the rearrangement. Nose, Appearance , Burn, Rush, and Flavor is what I’ll be evaluating this time around.
We begin with a strong sting of ammonia the first time the tin is opened. Once that has faded, the nose of Toasted is strong with a bland of Oriental and Cuban tobacco character.
The hue is that of baker’s cocoa, and the fine dry toast grind (whence cometh the name, obviously) do nothing to shake that look. Moreover, the grind is just moist and soft enough to be a delight when pinched. I don’t get much in the way of pilling in the fingers, but there is just enough moisture to keep it where I want it long enough to put it where it’s going.
Now we get to the burn — and although the burn on Toasted doesn’t reach the same intensity as the last snuff I reviewed, the burn comes on — as is typical with toasts — immediately. And it is intense. I’m convinced that practically any offering from FUBAR should be taken with care. You absolutely do not want to go too hard on the sniff and get this stuff anywhere beyond the nostril.
It may not start a riot in your nostril the way BOHICA and Willie Pete are said to do, but you get it one millimeter past the border between nostril and sinus, and you’d better plan to do nothing but yell for the next five minutes.
Is the rush worth the risk? Damn skippy it is. The rush from Toasted won’t hit you like a truck the way the burn might, but it comes on smooth, steady and strong. The nose translates wonderfully in the nostril, making the world smell like coumarin cigar, while the calming lift from the nicotine smooths everything out very nicely.
That flavor is where Toasted is a real winner — in some ways in spite of, and in other ways because of the strong burn and fine grind which demand so much care in taking the pinch. I’m half tempted to suggest that even Toasted isn’t a beginner-friendly snuff — but, on the other hand, it seems arrogant of me to give that impression of it, since I am relatively speaking still a beginner myself.
Perhaps it’s more even-handed to say that Toasted isn’t what I would hand someone who wanted to try snuff for the very first time. For the first timer, I would more readily recommend something from Toque.
If you are ready to try FUBAR Toasted, however, you can get it here.
Thanks for reading, and until next time, please remember to support this blog; do good work, and be good to yourselves and each other.